Like the dating game but…not…quite…the…same…

Have I mentioned that I’m having a baby? Ha ha ha…that’s pretty funny. With how much I complain these days, I don’t think it is possible that anyone within earshot can possibly miss that I am like a ticking bomb, so close to going off and delivering this kid. Plus there’s that whole reaction upon actually visually seeing just how full of baby boy I currently am (co-workers have been doing the low whistle upon seeing me turn sideways for the past week. I’m not quite sure whether I should be ashamed or proud).

Ahem. Okay so yes, now that we have clarified that yes I am a) pregnant (36 weeks worth) and b) ready to give birth like yesterday (yes yes, I realize that I am not even full term until next week, so really I’m being a bit facetious here–but anyone who has ever been pregnant so knows what I’m feeling) let’s talk about my fabulous doctor’s visit today. I know you are all just dying to know the oh-so-exciting details (ha).

Up until last week’s appointment (week 35), I hadn’t actually met with any of the 3 doctors in the practice that might deliver my little boy. I’d just kept on seeing the same nurse practitioner that I always see for appointments until it suddenly hit me that, Hey–I’m getting closer to this actually being done and it might be nice to have an idea of which face might show up at my crotch urging me to push a little ahead of time (I like surprises…but only to a certain degree–call me crazy). So, I started the doctor rotation with each visit. So far, with today’s visit, I’ve met two of the three possibilities for who will be in the delivery room with us. Is it bad that the whole process makes me think of that old game show, ‘The Dating Game’? Instead of bachelor #1, 2, and 3 I have Doctor #1, 2, and 3. I have this little dialogue (along with the snappy theme music) that goes on in my head, something along the lines of this:

Prego (aka grumpy hormonal me): Doctor #1, what’s your idea of the ideal delivery?

Doctor #1: well, first we’d make sure you’re really in labor and dialated to a 10, then we’d start the pushing…

Prego: That sounds great. Doctor #2, same question.

Doctor#2: Well, we’d start with you strapped to the bed with monitors on you and the baby and a self-administered epidural available at the touch then move to a slow pitocin drip…

Prego: Mmmm…that sounds wonderful (giggle)

So far the 2 doctors that I’ve actually met have been nice (one kind of reminded me of my dad, which was a little…weird). I’ve heard the 3rd (to be met next week) is the funny one…so I guess I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed that I like him too and that I manage to be lucky enough to have him be the on-call doctor when I actually go into labor.

In other exciting news, I did manage to find out that I am strep B negative this week (not that I was too worried…just one more thing NOT to have to think about). However, finding out that the swab test would be occuring at last week’s appointment with the doctor I had never met before (yes, hello, nice to meet you and here is my crotch) was a little ahem…exciting (and not in the good exciting kind of way either).

Only 11 more working days until Maternity leave starts and I can be the beached pregnant whale on the bed like I want to be. I think everything that needs to be bought has been (with the exception of the baby monitor to be bought this weekend–any suggestions?) and I’m hoping to start packing my bag. I’m just really really ready to have this baby in like 3 weeks and not 5 (which Dr. #1 so helpfully reminded me last week is the typical norm for a first time mom–41 weeks). Here’s to not losing my mind or smothering my husband (so help me if he tells me one more time it can’t be that bad…I’m not responsible for my actions…seriously) in the next few weeks!