Last week was one of those weeks that just kind of flew by. Which, depending on the events of the particular day, was probably a good thing. I give you my recap of the last week in short list format for your viewing pleasure:

Sunday: Owen locks himself in the car after church. Thankfully the car was running at the time and the AC was running full blast. Not so good was the Ambulance and Fire Truck that had to come to the church parking lot to unlock the door, lights ablaze and sirens wailing. After this, I don’t think I can complain that I don’t know very many people in my congregation.

Monday: A small tornado touched down in three separate locations located within about a block of my house. Ask me how glad I am that it wasn’t our house that sustained extensive roof damage like the guy down the street. It was pretty crazy—it came up out of nowhere and by the time I had completed the thought process that the clouds across the way appeared to be swirling in a circular pattern and were sucking things up off the ground into them and maybe it would be a good idea to grab Owen and head for the basement, it was all over.

Tuesday was pretty quiet, although I did learn that my child already, at only almost 2, knows the power of a good poop joke as evidenced by his highly vocal performance of fake pooping on the potty.

Wednesday: I shake my fist and curse the grain product that was infested with carpet beetles that I so cleverly (unknowingly) bought and brought home to the cupboard and find that I am now completely infested on all three shelves of the very tall and very deep cupboard. Really, I ask you, what’s more fun than impromptu total cupboard cleaning, complete with pest spray? Especially when you make the initial discovery of infestation after 10pm at night. Do I know how to party around here or what?

Thursday: Discover that wild rabbits have completely eaten 12 petunias before they can even be planted in front flower bed, along with first three blooms on zucchini plant. Debate merits of pellet gun vs. live trap. Ultimately decide to put down hair instead.

Friday: Pick husband up at 4am after he has been out of town for work for 5 weeks. Come to the conclusion that husband needs to schedule arrival home after 8am in the future. Also consider most effective area to kick repeatedly when husband tries to get frisky at 5am after being picked up and does not seem to fully grasp the concept that if Mama is more sleep deprived than usual, no good can come of it.

Saturday & Sunday: Temperatures do not go below 90 degrees. The idea of lying naked on the AC unit crosses my mind more than once. That is, when I wasn’t engaged in creatively rearranging my clothes so as to achieve maximum sweat removal from bodily crevices.

The saddest part of all? The above represents a fairly normal week around casa YouMeAndABaby.

I’m just having one of those weeks where I feel like…well, like if I just opened up my mouth and started screaming for like 5 minutes at a go, that it could possibly help and make me feel better.

Owen decided starting Friday night that all the progress he’d made towards sleeping better was SO OVER and the resulting nights since have been less blissful motherhood and more wondering about a) when the next circus is coming through town and b) exactly how big of a handful of peanuts I could trade my child for. Oh, how I kid. Really though, some days this whole being someone’s mother is just so much harder and more daunting than I thought or ever imagined it would be. It isn’t that I regret having a child–already Owen is the best and most amazing thing I have ever done in my life–I just sometimes long for logic and for things to fall neatly into line just because I say so. I don’t really mind all the other minor inconveniences and irritations if we could just hammer out the sleep issues once and for all and be done with it.

I have also decided that if the plants in the garden don’t shape up soon and get it together enough to start growing instead of dying off despite twice daily waterings, all varieties of plants in the garden will henceforth be known as “Damn (fill in vegetable name here)”. Not that it changes anything, but something about muttering “damn beans” through tightly pursed lips just makes me feel the teensiest bit better. Garden, I will triumph. Even if I have to buy out the seedling section of Lowe’s three times over to make it happen.

Also, there is a very large dead bird in my garbage bin. I have made the executive decision to leave the lid off until garbage pickup on Thursday despite there being a forecast for continued heavy rain the rest of the week because of the two possible resulting scenarios for this situation, I think I’d much rather have the one that doesn’t end in extra-stinky bloated dead bird versus just stinky bloated dead bird floating in its very own coating of garbage juice.

And on that extremely appetizing note, I bid you good day.

The potty training is progressing very nicely at my house. If I wanted to tempt fate, I’d say something along the lines of that there could be a very real possibility of Owen being able to wear big boy pants (during the day at least) by the end of summer. But I’m not so keen on giving fate the finger like that and inviting disaster, so we’re not saying that out loud.

In fact, just last night Owen figured out that he could make the pee^pees (hey, we’re all kinds of proper at my house) come out if he concentrated about it.

Which was really really great while he was sitting on the potty. Yay for big boy pee^pees in the potty!

However…

Not so great after getting off the potty and being chased through the living room and kitchen while I tried to catch him to wrangle a diaper on.

Have I mentioned how glad I am for hardwood this week?