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    Where are Winkin, Blinkin and Nod when you really need them?

    February 13, 2007

    Once upon a time, about a decade ago, getting through the day on less than five total hours of sleep was not a big deal. In fact, any night that I got more than six hours of sleep was considered a rarity since I was in college full time and working full-time to support myself through school. Sleep was often a luxury that there just wasn’t extra time to allow for in my schedule. Sure, I was often tired, but I could function relatively well and when I would get really desperate for sleep, I’d just hold out until weekends or breaks from school and then just sleep for 10-12 hours at a stretch and ‘refuel’ with sleep and be ready to do it all over again the next week.

    Fast forward a few years (like to my mid to late twenties) and see how pitiful I have become. Ten o’clock at night would hit and it was like a sleeping pill–time to go to bed. At the time, I was living at my grandparents house (I’d house-sit when they were out of town and they traveled a lot, so it was just easier to live there all the time) and often I’d be in bed for the night before my grandparents would even have turned in for the night. This trend getting to bed early and actually getting eight plus hours of sleep a night was the norm, even after I got married. It was very rare, even on weekends that we would stay up past 11:30 pm. If, due to some freak occurence, we managed to stay up really really late, like say until 1 or 2 am (we party hard at our house, let me tell you) then we’d regret it for the next week, since it would take that long to feel not so tired anymore.

    Enter Owen into our lives. He had us fooled quite well in the beginning. At about 2 weeks, he started sleeping mostly through the night–for at least five hours at a stretch, usually only waking up once, maybe twice to eat. Right around Christmas, we got off his normal schedule and did go through a bit of a rough patch, but by the first week in January, it was looking like he was going to start sleeping the entire night through, every couple of nights waking up once to eat, but overall on the road to becoming a good little sleeper.

    However, two going on three weeks ago, Owen seems unable to sleep more than about an hour and a half at a stretch at night. Even if I am able to get him down for the night without incident, he wakes up, usually without fail at around 11:30pm- midnight and from then until 3am–NO.ONE.SLEEPS. Or, if they do, it isn’t very restful sleep. Owen wants to nurse, so I nurse him. Then he doesn’t want to be in his crib, so I bring him to sleep with us (now with the added bonus that Owen then thinks this is an invitation to nurse EVERY.TWENTY.MINUTES.CONTINUOUSLY). Then he doesn’t want to be in our bed. My husband and I rock him and sing to him, snuggle his soft blankie and frog lovie in around him. We turn on soft soothing white noise. We pat him, we burp him, we rock him again. We finally give up and let him cry it out for twenty, thirty minutes and when that fails, we start the cycle all over again.

    Internet, I am about at the end of my rope (and I strongly suspect my husband is as well). I am averaging about 4 hours of sleep a night, if I’m lucky and mind you, those hours are not necessarily continuous hours of sleep either. I am so tired, I have about no short term memory left. Let me sit somewhere for more than five minutes and I start to nod off. I just can’t figure out what the problem is–Owen doesn’t have (hasn’t had) reflux or gas. He eats and nurses well, especially before bed. We have a very soothing routine we follow every single night before bed. His room is neither too hot nor too cold. Owen iscurrently trying to grow a tooth on the bottom, but it apparently isn’t bothering him because we don’t have any problems with it at any other time during the day.

    What are the chances that this is just a really ugly phase and when it ends in another week (PLEASE.LET.IT.END.) we’ll head into the beautiful land of him sleeping for eight continous hours at a stretch?

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    This could all be over if you’d just let me pick your nose

    February 7, 2007

    It truly amazes (and at times, deeply disturbs) me to hear some of the things that come out of my mouth. Though he is not as bad as I hear some husbands can be, my husband manages to acheive certain appalling levels of grossness that then require comment on my part (while in my head I am thinking, “Did I really just say that?”). I didn’t anticipate that it would only go downhill more after the arrival of Owen.

    Things I may or may not have said during the past week to either or both of the male occupants in our house (help help, I am so outnumbered–and one is less than a year old)
    * Do you think you could make the house stink anymore?

    * Can you give me a rough estimate of when it will be safe to breathe again this
    afternoon, not having to use the neck of my shirt as an odor shield?

    * Good grief–what did you eat? (sadly, this was said to both Owen and his
    father)

    * Here let me pick at that and see if I can get it (again, disturbingly used for
    both Boy and Father)

    My husband is out of town for business this week (internet perverts beware: I do
    know how to use the shotgun that we own) and things are actually going better than I had imagined. This has been my first extended time with Owen with no husband to hand him off to when Owen is crabby and tired and refuses to sleep. Of course now that I have typed that last sentence, fate will see fit to swoop down and cause me to see first hand how exactly this time playing at single parenting could go so much worse.

    We are currently receiving our first ‘real’ snowfall of the winter and if it keeps up at the rate it is currently coming down at, we should have several inches accumulated by morning. If I worked anywhere but where I do, work would so be cancelled in the morning due to inclement weather. Not my place of employment. We never close (and no–it is not 7-eleven you silly goose). I guess we’re kind of like the US Postal Service of non-profit groups–we’re open regardless of the weather. Heck, when parts of our not exactly large building (read: people’s offices within the building) flooded last year after an extremely heavy unexpected rainfall popped up while the building’s roof was being replaced we just rearranged offices and carried on like nothing had happened. Even after it was discovered that several large parts of the building had nasty black mold growing in the walls post-freak rainstorm, we were just warned to avoid those areas while they were being treated, lest we suck spores into our unsuspecting lungs. I guess what I’m saying is that even if we were to suddenly have some sort of other natural disaster, I would still be going to work in the morning. I guess if everyone else gets to stay home because everything is closed, that should cut off a minute or three of my commute.